Being Brave on a Sunday

Underneath my cynic sheep clothing, an incurable romantic. I believe in love, I believe that completes you, I believe it offers you a new perspective on yourself. I believe.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

It's Okay

I think people sometimes confuse my honesty here at Brave with a low self esteem or a weak sense of self, and I kind of want to clear that up. I'm like any normal, average person; sure improvements could be made, but generally I'm pretty happy with the overall package of Brave Girl. I actually think I'd be a pretty okay girlfriend - and there are a few reasons as to why.

1. I'm in no way dependent. In fact, I'm ultra independent. I don't need to know what you had for breakfast, as long as you enjoyed it, that's fine. We don't need to call every single day, all day and talk about every minute detail. That's what a date's for.
2. I have all my teeth. A small detail but somewhat underrated.
3. I have a good sense of humour. Sarcasm is my friend, but I'm very willing to laugh at myself. And I'd have people who would support this.
4. I have a job which I actually enjoy. Which means, a) I won't spunge off you, I'm happy to share the tickets for the movies and b) I've got things to do besides moon over you.
5. Not to toot my own horn, but for the fellas, I've got a pretty impressive rack. And added bonus, I'm not McSlutty girlfriend who feels everyone needs to see them. No, your friends will be impressed but not get a lap dance because my clothing is super revealing.
6. I can and will follow sport. In fact, I can watch an entire cricket match (a test!), I could probably name the current Australian 11, I can name many AFL players and not just the ones who sleep around, and I even can talk motorsport. It's pretty impressive, especially considering I'm not butch.
7. I'm good with new people, I can strike a conversation with almost anyone, so you won't have to have the sappy girlfriend hanging off your arm all night long.
8. I can cook. And not just re-heat.
9. I'm tall but not playing in the WNBA. You won't lose me in the crowd but I'll never be a leaning perch for you.
10. I like nerdy boy shows sometimes. I understand you may need to watch Star Trek, I'll sit down to watch the umpteenth screening of Firefly, and if you need to play on the computer, you go right ahead. I may not be able to debate the importance between the Sith Lord's and Darth Vader but I'll know who you're talking about.

I just feel that sometimes Brave turns into a whinge fest and I wanted it to be clear that I'm not a cat counting, romantic comedy on perm-a-loop watching sad lonely girl who just waits for Prince Charming to march up to the door. Come to the door, but I do have a life too.

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The above lists ties in as well because recently I went to a dinner party where I was the solo single guest. I don't really have a problem with this, they are close friends and nothing's worse than an uncomfortable setup date. After dinner the girls were in the kitchen, and we ended up discussing my love life. My friend turned to me and said 'I just don't get why you're single,' and I thought, oh yes, the usual, thanks for the kind thoughts. She however, repeated herself and was firm 'Brave, I actually don't understand why you're single.' And I was really touched by that, because often I drive myself around in circles, thinking is it me? What is wrong? What can I change? What would make me more appealing? And sure, I have bad habits but sometimes I can be too harsh on myself, and if I know anything, it's that there are a lot of good single people out there. And while saying everyone has a soulmate is trivialising and romanticising something far more complex, I still think that out there, in my vicinity, is someone who will love me. Love me for all that I am, and for everything I hope to be. And of course, that's unbelievablely cliched and over the top, but I still believe it. I don't think I'd be alive if I didn't. And as my mother says, every pot has a lid. I just think my lid is stuck in the back of the drawer.

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